Saturday, July 12, 2008

202 post already???

Can you believe I've actually posted 202 times? And probably not a one worth reading?! I normally try to keep them short {especially lately} but tonight {since it's a Saturday night and I have nothing better to do} I thought I might make it a little lengthy.

Let me start by showing the painting that I F-I-N-A-L-L-Y finished!!
Do you guys remember this post - the one where I got a little help from Hudson?? Well, here is the final canvas - 3 canvases later! Like I said, he did me a favor because I like this color combination "mow better" - that is how a little Guatemalan man that worked on our old house said "more better" - even though that is not even a proper phrase?! Who cares - we say "mow better" all the time because of him. Rambo was his name - haha - and he was so scrawny!!! I wish I took a picture of him - you guys would crack up.

Focus, Kim, focus!!!
But, anyways - this does look better and I do think it took me forever to finish this one 8x10!! Forevah I tell ya'! I really think I need a new camera - or maybe it's just me {the one taking the pictures!}

I had a comment about this painting in this post - actually I had several comments about the painting - If anyone is interested in a painting similar to that one, just email me! I say similar - because I can't replicate my own work! I just can't - literally, if I wanted to - I couldn't do it! Does that make sense?

I don't know what in the world reminded me of this tale I'm about to share with you - but I got to thinking about it and got to laughing and it's late and I can't call anybody and share - sooooo, I thought I would share with all of you!

It was this time 4 years ago, I went with one of my best friends in the world {Rachel} to New Orleans. Her brother, Trever, who she is extremely close to was getting married. And his fiance wanted to have her bachelorette party as a weekend long trip to New Orleans. There was only Shannon {the fiance,} her cousin, her best-friend, Rachel and myself that went. Let me back up and tell you that I just found out I was pregnant with Hudson! So, you got ME, pregnancy, bachelorette party & New Orleans - not a great mix, but I had to go for Rachel!! I also must tell you that it wasn't my first trip to the stinky city sooo I knew what I was getting into!! Now, I'm not going to get in all the details - but I did want to share a little as to what happened.

At every place we went, I being pregnant, ordered Sprite. That was the nastiest, flattest carbonation I had ever had before! Every server, waiter, bartender . . . , would ask, "just Sprite?" Of course I'm thinking, "didn't stutter - just a sprite you idiot - not everybody wants to drink alcohol!" But I was polite and would say, "yes, please - Just a sprite!" Of course I would then make Rachel take the first drink to make sure there was no alcohol in it! I wasn't taking any chances. Obviously, Sprite wasn't ordered very often - so that was some nasty JuJu as it sat and sat and sat and waited for a sober, pregnant chick to order it!

At one club, some guy tried to get his freak on with me - I tried throwing out the, "uhhmmm, I'm pregnant" line - didn't work - he was even more determined as ever and tried to RUB MY STOMACH!! As he commented, "as long as it ain't mine!" What a wanker!

Some how we actually got on one of the balconies along Bourbon Street. Don't ask how - just know we did. I think it was a bachelor party - don't worry, none of the people I was with did anything we would regret! But there were tons, and I do mean tons of people on the street below wanting beads. And the guys {who were having the bachelor party} gave us a bunch to throw down. So, here we have a bunch of drunk, grown men screaming down to these folks, "show me whatcha got!" "Ladies, I've got beads, You got to earn them!" and blah, blah, blah!! Can I tell you that these silly girls actually lifted up their shirts!! Yeah, I couldn't believe it! It was crazy!! Crazy being these girls weren't wearing a bra! Now, come on - who doesn't wear a bra?? In public!? Well, don't think I kept my mouth shut - I started yelling down at these silly girls,

"Oh my, girl - I will be praying for you!!"

"Put those things up - those can't earn you a bead, much less a string of them!"

"I hope those weren't expensive - You need to get a refund!"

"Go to church and ask for forgiveness!"

I could go on & on with my list of comments. Just know that I was really blown away when some guy pull his "thing" out!! I screamed, "Ewww - If I give you some beads will you promise to put it UP!!" as I was throwing-up in my mouth! Trashy - McNasties! Needless to say, every drunk fool on that balcony was laughing! If I remember right, I think they asked Rachel what I was drinking?! She told them, "flat sprite." haha!!

Okay - can I tell you that I have SO MUCH respect for those who can stand up in such a place as the streets of New Orleans with a big white sign that says "Jesus Loves You" and hand out fliers about salvation to the millions of {drunk} fools that walked past them! Rachel and I were so amazed by these people. One day they will be greeted at the gate with open arms - I'm sure of it!

It is a very interesting town - and was a very interesting trip. There are so many great stories from that weekend. But I'll leave it at that! Rachel, if you were awake - I would sooo call you right now {and remind you of all the Hot Dog stands!}


joanne said...

it seems mamas with little babies are up at this hour. cute art, funny post!

Natalie said...

ok, that's funny and I SO remember when you went there!!

Mommy said...

Kim--I just about peed my pants on that one. You are hysterical...

Rach said...

heh heh--wouldn't expect any less from you...just wish I could have been there to see it! love the painting too--I LIKE those colors!!

Mel said...

Oh my GOSH! That is absolutely the funniest thing I've ever read in my entire life! I occasionally sneak over to your sight via the Spence's and look at all your fun stuff but for some reason that post jumped out at me and I nearly wet my pants the first time. Then I told Phillip I had to read it to him and I think I did pee a little. We'll blame it on the pregnancy! I love this post and will keep it bookmarked for days I need a pick me up! SO FUNNY! Thanks for the laugh!